Common House Residents Journal #11: 2014-11-30

Entry #: 11
Journal Type: inworld
Date: 2014-11-30
Replies: yes
Author: Cecil
Trigger Warnings: chronic health issues, some talk of death and doom

Carlos and I got some very... exciting and surprising news this weekend. I'm going to keep the details a secret for a bit longer, but I'm kind of having mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, it's neat and something I want. On the other hand, all my chronic pain issues are flaring up because of this and it's emphasizing the bad parts of the experience.

Carlos is... distracting himself with science, but i kind of expected him to do that. He's been very busy documenting a highly time-sensitive project an alchemist and a witch are working on to try and make a synthetic mirror of this potion some folks call "Water of Life" that only works at reviving some people in-system so that it works for everyone because some parts of our inner world are more dangerous than others and it's nice to have a working Plan B if things go wrong and also because one of the residents is very ill and they're trying to see if they can revive him IF the inevitable happens because he has a family.

(x-posted from Plurality Resource Forum)

Common House Residents Journal #10: 2014-11-04

Entry #: 10
Journal Type: mixed
Date: 2014-11-04
Replies: yes
Author: Carlos
Trigger Warnings: SI [mentioned, non-graphic], triggers, anxiety, mental health, some ribbing about coping techniques

Last month was weird in both good and bad ways.

One of the residents inworld kind of accidentally triggered me a few weeks ago with some blatant disregard about SI-stuff.... At least people have told me he doesn't always have control of those filters. They've been working on it. He did make it up to me though. We fashioned the usual Halloween remembrance circle into an all-guilds masquerade with a Days of the Dead theme since he kind of ruined inworld game night's LARP by giving me a panic attack that lead to a second one because people were crowding me. It was kind of embarrassing and I'm still getting a bit of bleedthrough on the anxiety coming outworld. I've been doing some research on science while we write our NaNo because I really want to try to make a Science Fiction Science bingo on that card in allbingo. Cecil keeps giggling about "science as comfort defense mechanism" since DreamWriter started calling it that on Sunday after the conference teacher said "if you're stuck on characterization, you should think about characters as people and people are essentially a set of unique defense mechanisms for how to cope with the world. what drives stories and makes authentic characters are the moments when those mechanisms crack". Even though I know it's true and Cecil and DreamWriter mean it in the nicest possible way, it kind of makes me feel underappreciated (just a little bit).

The body rarely stims (I've been told repeatedly that other fronters have attempted to get the body a HFA/AS diagnosis [our formal dx is "Learning Disorder NOS, nonverbal deficits" to us it's mostly semantics; nonverbal disability tends to have a lot of overlap with AS], but between clueless parents, our interest in people, and the fact that we've apparently been passing since grade school we apparently don't qualify enough or something) but since I've been fronting it's more pronounced and more frequent (though some of the stims the body has are different from what I would do personally... like the toewalking). At least I can pretend I'm shaking/massaging our hands because our wrist brace is missing and NaNo apparently makes us really prone to carpal tunnel and ulnar nerve entrapment.

(x-posted from Plurality Resource Forum)